Sunday, April 6, 2014

What is love? What is Marriage? A child's Opinion

I am sitting at the table painting as usually and I have my little helper, Riley.  We are talking about whatever the 5 year old thinks is important at the time and Riley says "I am going to marry Tommy, I am in LOVE with him."  I respond, "Really?  Riley tell me what is LOVE?"  Riley explained to me, "LOVE is really being in LOVE with someone."  So then I asked her, "Well what is marriage?" My five year old at this point literally sits there for a minute thinking. She then stated, "It is teamwork, it is hugging and kissing, marriage is working together." 


At this point I stop painting, I am sitting there staring at my child in disbelief.  My next thought was, we are doing something right.  Marriage is team work, Marriage is hugging and kissing, Marriage is working together.  Our children mimic and see more than we know.  My marriage is one of the most important treasures in my life, I love my husband.  Clint and I do work together, we are a great team, and we work at this everyday.  I didn't realize this is what our girls see in their everyday life.  I never really put much thought into it.   I had an overwhelming feeling of  comfort that came over me,  "Teamwork" is how my girls see how a marriage should be. 

In writing this blog topic today I was looking up divorce statistics, do you know that 50% of marriages will end in Divorce?  This is a sad statistic, the question is when did divorce become acceptable? I do believe there are certain marriages that are not meant to be and certain marriages that are toxic for everyone involved and there is no alternative but did you know that lack of communication is the number one reason people get divorced? Second reason for divorce is finances, obviously followed by abuse, affairs etc.  But what happened to the teamwork?  Marriage is not easy, you must work together and work at your marriage every day. It is too easy to say, "I'm done, I want out."  I can't imagine my life without my husband, my best friend, my team mate and I feel a marriage is something worth fighting and working for.

(My marriage advice:  Never forget....marry your best friend and keep your spouse as your best friend, have fun AND keep flirting)

How is your marriage? More importantly how do your kids perceive your marriage?  We learn by example, show your kids how things should be, not just tell them!